Buffering

CHRISTIAN SIDE HUG perfectly embodies the uneasiness and...

Tue, 24 Nov 2009 20:34:00 -0600

CHRISTIAN SIDE HUG perfectly embodies the uneasiness and misdirected energy that one feels growing up in the wind scorned, scrab-grass suburbs of Oklahoma. The misappropriation of hip hop for the purposes of spreading the gospel about the horrific possibilities of frontal hugs leading to legs spreading, the fervor in their performance, it all makes the eyes well up with holy water.

Glistening brilliance. Viewing required.

[via Buzzfeed, and DoCo, and Beatty, and Santos. Like you’re surprised.]

A video taken from the tippy top of the Burj Dubai, the highest...

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 08:34:50 -0600

A video taken from the tippy top of the Burj Dubai, the highest man-made point on the planet. If I were anywhere close to this, I’d certainly toss my cookies.

[via Gizmodo]

“Finger Tutting” is indicative of what youth culture...

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 09:17:59 -0600

“Finger Tutting” is indicative of what youth culture will become in the future: Activities, like dance, that will be designed so that they can be enjoyed alone, while sitting in front of a glowing screen.

I suspect that this is what happened to all of those guys at clubs dancing with their invisible orbs. They were shamed into the privacy of their own homes.

The fact that I don’t understand this is concrete evidence that I am officially old.

[via Buzzfeed]

Watching Pedro Martinez pitch against the Yankees in Game 2 of...

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 09:54:43 -0500

Watching Pedro Martinez pitch against the Yankees in Game 2 of the World Series last night would have been special anyway, but watching it on my parents’ house-sat HDTV made me as happy as a b-boy lacing up tri-stripes to the bongos opening “Apache”. I don’t like the Yankees one sliver, and Pedro is a former Met, so you can guess who I was rooting for. Plus, the golden-armed pitcher once used his swift appendage to drop 72-year-old Don Zimmer to the ground during the 2003 ALCS. See video above.

Baseball is filled with back story, and the context you gradually garner over the slow-paced battles is what makes this game the greatest ever napped through. Quiet but focused Soap Opera Tension.

In HD, the drama is increased exponentially. You can see every muscle twitch. Every tendon pull. Tiny dirt clods kicked into the players’ corneas. Individual pores blocked with viscous blood. Last night there wasn’t any blood, but there were plenty of Pedro. Too bad the Yankees won.

[Thanks for the link, Taylor L.]

KOOL KEITH AND THE 98-YEAR-OLD REFRIGERATOR is enough ga-ga to...

Fri, 30 Oct 2009 00:56:00 -0500

KOOL KEITH AND THE 98-YEAR-OLD REFRIGERATOR is enough ga-ga to sex up the eyeballs for one more go-around with that whore, the Internet.

“Nobody wants your pumpernickel bread.”

Kool Keith is balls-up crazy. He boasted in Ego Trip’s Book of Rap Lists that his favorite public place to masturbate was the bathroom of the Sbarro’s Pizza in Times Square. And we all believed him. Rap heads were “dropping by for a slice” of men’s-room emcee mastery for months. Fucking fandom will take you to some dirty places.

[Thanks, everydaydude. You know my steez.]

theduty: sujay: Greatest Mascot Dance of All Time Beauty...

Wed, 28 Oct 2009 19:08:54 -0500

theduty:

sujay:

Greatest Mascot Dance of All Time

Beauty exists in this world because some people take their jobs seriously. This guy can easily make your kids happy and convince your wife to give him a vaginal cheer in the section C storage closet before you even return with your flat rack of overpriced hot dogs and under-carbonated soda. Just watch him move. LOVE YOUR JOB is the moral I’m getting at.

Ah, Max Headroom, the man with the microchip moxie and the...

Wed, 28 Oct 2009 18:47:00 -0500

Ah, Max Headroom, the man with the microchip moxie and the studio-swollen stutter. You will always be the segue to our hearts.

Arguably the best 3 minutes of television from the last thirty...

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 14:33:00 -0500

Arguably the best 3 minutes of television from the last thirty years. Encapsulates my childhood fascination with cocaine, fast cars, shoulder pads, quiet male moments, electronic drums, and subtext.

(Sorry about the abrupt ending. Couldn’t find a version that didn’t have a truncated tail.)

[via nostalgia]

MOMENTS, by Will Hoffman. Presented originally by the...

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:10:00 -0500

MOMENTS, by Will Hoffman. Presented originally by the oft-epiphanic Radio Lab. Watch it. It will only take a few.

Circle quirk. Philip Glass and Sesame Street team up for a...

Fri, 18 Sep 2009 14:50:34 -0500

Circle quirk.

Philip Glass and Sesame Street team up for a moment of revelatory geometry.

[thanks, Ainsley]

A bus careens into an illegally-parked Porsche. An effective...

Sat, 12 Sep 2009 18:19:21 -0500

A bus careens into an illegally-parked Porsche.

An effective argument for public transit.

likeit: Oedipus Rex, as performed by vegetables. The most tragic...

Tue, 08 Sep 2009 11:08:55 -0500

likeit:

Oedipus Rex, as performed by vegetables.

The most tragic part is that there is no butter or sour cream.

My friend Chris, the brains behind FWIS, emailed me a couple of...

Mon, 07 Sep 2009 09:44:00 -0500

My friend Chris, the brains behind FWIS, emailed me a couple of days ago, wondering if I’d be willing to leave the catacombs of Long Island for a night out in Brooklyn, with five dudes. “We’re going to Peter Luger,” he said. “Really fucking good steakhouse. Guys’ night out. Take the train in and I’ll treat you.” I said yes, but had no idea what I was in for.

Six men, two huge sides of cow that melted on the tongue like ice cream, and the best creamed spinach you’ve never had.

Two days later and I’m still digesting the porterhouse. When I have a heart attack, it will be a delicious one.

This spot was condemned by AIDS charities, but advertising like...

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 18:56:27 -0500

This spot was condemned by AIDS charities, but advertising like this gives me faith in advertising. Excuse me while I go buy some condoms.

You’re offended? Good. That means it was strong enough to elicit an emotion. You won’t soon be forgetting this, will you?

melissasantos: “die roboter” — kraftwerk. i’ve always wanted to...

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 17:47:51 -0500

melissasantos:

“die roboter” — kraftwerk.

i’ve always wanted to be the man-machine-era kraftwerk for halloween, but none of my friends seem to like that idea. maybe if i thow in “sexy” they’ll be up for it.

I’m all for it. Kraftwerk taught us that computers can be soulful. That’s enough reason for you to be a member of Kraftwerk for Halloween, even if no one gives you any Computer Love. Besides, this kind of costume is inherently sexy. Remember: when a member of Kraftwerk rocks the party, there’s never a single floppy disc in the (haunted) house.

You can have my LETHAL PING-PONG-BALL RIFLE when you pry it from...

Fri, 04 Sep 2009 10:55:00 -0500

You can have my LETHAL PING-PONG-BALL RIFLE when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.

[via Make]

The rumors were true. The ZOMBIE WEATHERMAN APP shoves the...

Thu, 03 Sep 2009 12:13:08 -0500

The rumors were true. The ZOMBIE WEATHERMAN APP shoves the mouth-watering brains into your smartest smartphone.

I don’t know if you should plan a picnic this weekend. There’s a 40% chance of rain, with widespread decay imminent.

My copy-crafting company is currently working for the good...

Wed, 02 Sep 2009 14:07:00 -0500

My copy-crafting company is currently working for the good people at ALPHA Multimedia. In the course of writing case studies for them, I penned an email in which I used the word “hombre” non-ironically. Ainsley immediately informed me that doing so makes me an automatic douchebag. So then I wrote an apology email to ALPHA, hoping I wouldn’t lose too much respect if I pre-emptively owned up to my nomenclature no-no.

Mike, from ALPHA, responded with this video.

STEVIE WONDER DRUM SOLO, for your jaw-slackening...

Wed, 02 Sep 2009 10:45:37 -0500

STEVIE WONDER DRUM SOLO, for your jaw-slackening pleasure.

Anyone who’s ever played the drums knows that this kind of feat is near-impossible with full sight.

If this doesn’t push a smile onto your mug, you’re probably a direct descendent of Hitler. Which means you’ve got other problems (like unpopular mustache growth).

[via everybody]

From the Museum of Animal Perspectives, here is a glimpse into...

Tue, 01 Sep 2009 15:28:18 -0500

From the Museum of Animal Perspectives, here is a glimpse into the exercise routine of an armadillo. Quite dizzying.

[Thanks, everydaydude]